.

A cold gloomy morning

Shouldn’t it be nice to snuggle under the blankets in this pouring rain? I guess everyone who can sleep in are doing that. I can sleep in, but I can’t fall back to sleep. There is too much going on in my mind. It was a surprise I could fall asleep last night.

I hope it wouldn’t be a scar for life. Trust has been built, but now I don’t know how I can ensure myself nothing like this will ever happen again. Ever. In the near future, or not even if when we grow old. It brought back every single fear and anxiety I have faced in different phases of my life and to think last night brought back those fearful feelings, especially from a very trusted love one. It scares me. It freaks me out.

I wished it never happened. I wished I never asked.

Let the rain fall down, and wash away, all my fears and tears which are meant to be forgotten.

“It wasn’t you… It wasn’t you. It couldn’t have been you…”

Let it be a nightmare I never want to remember.

And I won’t blame you.

But I’ll never ask. Ever. Again.

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