25.3.13 / my first human interaction and some old songs for the night

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this is hilarious. while i was surfing the net and came across this, idk whether to laugh or feel sad. i decided to post it out and do both at the same time when i look at how realistic this picture depicts my life.  no reason to be sad, but i guess on rly tiring days, you just wna come home and rant it to someone and seek comfort – not everyone does that, but ive been doing that for the past 3 years so yea. i can’t for some time… so i’m here again. hello.

i feel bad this is my escape but it’s not like i’m anybody popular and my readers are close to limited or none so i guess my soap opera story and rant wouldn’t hurt much, does it? (oohh, i’m rly rly happy recently when i just found out ive friends whom i never thought wld read/follow my blog, and they actually follow! :O shoooo touched. thank youuu so much, yknow a reader is always the most precious for a writer because it makes me do whatever im doing worthwhile. yknow who you are -winkwink-)

supposed to do my project but i’m so restless, been trying to stay awake since 4pm when i was watching tv with the kids. a nap wld kill my whole night – just because i wouldn’t even be able to fall asleep if i had a nap. my boyfren always say i have too much energy thats why. i do nothing (tiring enough) everyday. despite coaching rollerblading, touch rugby, working dhsunglass, going to school… i’m still kickin’!! i know what killed me recently – the hot sun at turf city + a game of touch rugby. i was so sleepy and so drained from the sun, i went home and ZZZZZZZZzzzZzzZZzZzzzzz. life was good.

i’m playing some oldie now and it’s rly nice. i wna be able to sing all these oldies whenever i’m alone or with my future kids next time. i mean, EVERYONE have to know such songs right? at least one in your life.

you cannot CANNOT not sing along to this song…. love the beginning and the chorus.

another one of my favourite.  and she is so hottt & gorgeous :B

no call from W today. 2 more weeks left! it does feel rly long more but when i flipped to my calendar… it’s 25th March already! wow. where did March go? it’s almost over and i rly can’t rmb whatever significant that happened since he sailed on the 26th feb. work, school, work and work more. i’m so happy with my progress. work as many odd jobs as much as i can before i get eaten by this cruel society. odd jobs are fun and i wished i was 18 forever.

young, energetic and youthful. with sparkling eyes and glowing skin… we can only dream for that after we hit 21/

ok i rly lack human interaction. one of my happy resolution i made was “to be friendlier” and i think i tried to be that. i spoke to a guy classmate in my lecture today and i’m rly happy about it. i’m rly sick of sch, sick of entering the lecture hall and sitting alone at a corner where nobody will notice me. speak to nobody for the day at school, but only to my ipad or via text messaging. this morning, i made a good move. ….. although it was just asking which lecture slide we were at, it moved to a slight little convo. enough to make up for my whole semester. PPPPppppppathetic much.

x

shall leave something i read online on thoughtcatalog which i can very much relate to:

“I thought maybe after we were forced to be apart, I’d get used to your absence. I’d start to like having my alone-time back. I’d start to morph back into the independent person I was before you. It hasn’t worked. The distance has only made me think about you more. All day long, in fact. I can’t stop thinking about you because I know it’s going to be a good long while before I see you again. It’s like my brain has to fill the “you” quota because my body knows it won’t get what it needs.

I resent every minute I can’t be with you. I hate everything that keeps us apart. I hate school, I hate work, I hate obligations where we have to go and smile through gritted teeth and try and pay attention. I can’t pay attention because I can’t think about anything but you. I could see a loud, fantastic rock concert by my favorite band and the whole time I’d be thinking, “I wonder what so-and-so is up to.” If I go for a run, I picture you running beside me. When I eat with friends, I wonder how the dynamic would change if you were here.

I still have the shirt that smells like you. I wear it around the house to do chores, and because it makes me think you’re with me. It doesn’t help me to stop thinking about you, but it soothes the ache. I miss you, and I know we’ve made this decision to stay together and climb this hill together, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy. It’s so hard to try and force myself to do other things, to go out, to care about something other than you and what you might be doing off where ever you are.

I don’t want to be the person who isn’t listening when someone talks; instead, thinking about your eyes, your hair, your lips, your voice. But I can’t help it. You can’t tell yourself not to think about someone — that’s just asking to think about them even more. It’s like riding a wave, I guess. I have to wait for this love to crest and fall and then I’ll finally be able to function knowing you’re so far away from me, with no end in sight.

The distance doesn’t matter. It doesn’t erase you from my life. It doesn’t weaken your presence. It only makes you more important, more lovely, and more worth fighting for.  “””

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